Unknown's avatar

About wronghand

Who Am I? An aspiring novelist, working hard to complete my first novel. In previous years I have written, published and broadcast adult short stories, some posted here, and many stories for children. What Lights My Fire? My passions are the power of words, my love of books, art, people, all animals - but especially dogs - and the precarious future of our precious world. Where Have I Been? I've been travelling, mainly in Europe and South America, and blogging for several years on a variety of themes. I would love to hear from you, so please share your thoughts below. You will find links below to social media, so that I can contact and be contacted by friends and followers. Welcome to my small corner of our world, I hope you will find something here to interest you, make you smile or maybe even cry. Thank you for visiting!

Fall, food time…

Fall is almost here, or autumn, as we refer to the season in the UK. I think ‘Fall’ says it better. Leaves fall, temperatures fall, twilight falls earlier and earlier each evening.  Fall describes the misty, golden, shorter days, when you dig out your sweaters, scarves  and socks from last year and wrap up warm to go out and kick leaves like a kid.

The grocery stores are full of all kinds of apples, pumpkins and squash. Recipes leap out at me from my news feed, warm, comforting dishes: Apple Cakes with Caramel Sauce, Butternut and Barley Risotto with a whisper of Parmesan Shavings, a vegan waffle mix, with Chia Seed eggs, instead of the ones from a chicken. All worth an hour or two spent experimenting in the kitchen.

Trouble is, as usual, I’m keeping an eye on my waistline and trying to stop my little body becoming ever more roly-poly. Last evening we ate out and I chose Shangai Noodles with shavings of Rib-Eye steak. They were delicious and not too bad for my healthy eating regime. But the two generous glasses of Shiraz accompanying the meal probably, literally, tipped the scales. Still, red wine is good for the heart, so the experts are maintaining, at least they are this week.

I’m dreading the Christmas adverts, they’re only just appearing, but soon we’ll be facing a constant barrage of turkey, plum pudding and all-the-trimmings menus. By the time the big day arrives, all I want is chicken and vegetable soup, with chunky bread to dunk. I’ll have had it with the fancy finger food and ubiquitous baked hams, a million ways to stuff a turkey and brilliant brussels sprouts makeovers. Why not just give Christmas grub a miss altogether and hold off until Pancake Tuesday? My waistline would definitely feel the benefit!

Send in the Clowns?

Terror reigns on both sides of the pond!

While the presidential election sniping and hacking continues unabated in the US, a new wave of fear, imported from the States, is sweeping the UK. Even in the backwater of Norn Irn, so-called ‘killer’ clowns are appearing at random to terrify the unsuspecting populace. Schools are a particular target, which seems to me to be a particularly cowardly way for clowns to get their clowning kicks. Elderly people, too, are being singled out to frighten, though you’d think that the older generation would be so used to clowns appearing without warning over the decades they wouldn’t bat a drooping eyelid.

Several of these comically dressed and fearsomely masked or made-up clowns have gone further, standing in the path of oncoming traffic, reminiscent of the somewhat passe but once-much-loved-by-little-boys game of ‘Chicken’. Or leaping out in front of cars stopping at red lights or slowing down to manoeuvre. Sooner or later, one of these, yes, clowns, is going to get run down and killed. And that will be a shame, won’t it? I mean, it’s not even Halloween yet. And it’s hard to take an amusing selfie when you’re unconscious and bleeding all over the highway.

Election fever?

Been following western politics lately? Beats any TV drama or soap opera for entertainment, that’s for certain sure.

UK

In the last couple months the UK has voted in a referendum to leave the EU, this is commonly referred to as Brexit. This has resulted in, in no particular order:

The resignation of Cameron, the Prime Minister, oftimes referred to as ‘Dodgy Dave’

A declaration from Scotland that it will call a second vote to ‘leave the union’

Disgruntled mutterings from Northern Ireland about any reinstatement of border controls between NI and the Republic of Ireland

The value of sterling going up and down like a thing that goes up and down a lot

Europe

Barely concealed threats from other EU leaders to ‘punish’ the UK. Smack its bottom, perhaps? Various EU countries following the UK’s lead in considering their own position within the EU. The words ‘rats’ and ‘sinking ship’ spring to mind. Does nobody want to repair the stricken vessel and sail on to greater things, in harmony, tranquility and prosperity?  Get real, this is politics, not Pollyanna!

USA

Meanwhile, the long drawn out process for choosing a new president has arrived at the sorry spectacle of Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton engaging in televised debates as to who is the better candidate for the Presidency when Barack Obama’s second term comes to an end. Remember when UK protest voters used to support the Monster Raving Loony Party? Where is Homer Simpson when we need him most? Is there no alternative to these two alternatives who seem to bring out the worst traits in the US electorate?

The amount of tweets and media stories covering these events grows exponentially. I must stop reading them and get a life.

Stick to it…

Realised that I must get to know the new layout/features of WP – best way to do so? Must surely be by posting, posting, posting – not intermittently, but regularly, so here I am again. For instance, how to do Tags & Cats? No idea, so why not explore a bit? Okay, then, earwig Joe… and, while we’re at it, how about some pix? This is the kitchen…DSC04852

Long time, no dark wood…

No excuses, okay? Been busy. Making midyear resolutions, now, to kick ass – mine.

First, what I’ve done to date and, second, what I’ve read. So, let’s go-oo…

Written

  1. Coppers
  2. Silk Stockings
  3. Alpha Centauri
  4. Unrequited Love
  5. April is the cruellest month
  6. Ashley Madison
  7. Hamburg
  8. Godzilla & the Rats

Books

  1. We are all completely beside ourselves
  2. Fingersmith

Out in the Wood

Welcome to the Darkness, Friend. Here in the  Wood things are happening. Take today, for instance: first thing I notice, trees are moving. No, not swaying the way you’d expect trees to do, but doing a sort of frenzied foxtrot, know what I mean? Cool! Then the TV tells me to expect wind. I hate that. Who wants to hear that stuff? If I want to know I can expect wind, I’ll order some on the WoodWideWeb. You get me?

You guessed it; I prefer the unexpected, there’s too much same-old in the Wood these days. Shoots come up in Spring, leaves turn brown in the Fall, snow falls in Winter. That’s just so uncool. And now I’m going to be waiting for wind instead of doing something useful like clearing out my Toolshed. Not many Woodies even have a Toolshed. But I have. Mine has secret compartments; I’m not kidding. Last year I dug out the floor and installed them. Want to know what’s in there? Really? Well, I might tell you, but not right now – forgive me, but I hardly know you. I don’t even know your name; mine’s Hunter, didn’t I say? I’m still getting my Toolshed together, hidden compartments, secret stuff – everyone needs secret places, they’re just so cool. And I’m building… Hey! that was close, nearly let slip, didn’t I?

On my way today, I meet up with a couple of fellow Woodies. We stop and shake before passing on the latest news. Want to hear it? Okay, but keep it to yourself, right? There’s a rumour afoot that Weasels from the Long Hill are sneaking into the Dale. That will never work; the Dale belongs to the Rabbits, always has, always will. Weasels don’t always take notice of stuff like that, though. They’re kinda like a law onto themselves. Wouldn’t be surprised if they were to start with some of their sly Weasel tricks, trying to scare the Rabbits off from their burrows. Rabbits are okay, but they sure act dumb. They just hop and skip and dig holes and stuff their little rabbit mouths with green things, when they should be looking out for bad guys. Like Weasels, right? Trouble’s coming, that’s for sure. But I’ll be ready, when it comes. Time for me to go into my Toolshed and root out my Cover Cloak.

Well, I warned you all, that’s for sure, but did you listen? If there’s one thing I can do, it’s smell trouble. The Weasels have been up to no good and invaded the Dale. They snuck in two nights ago and blocked up the main entrances to the rabbit burrows: then, when all the dumb rabbits were panicking and running and jumping in all directions like excited grasshoppers, the Weasels just moved on in and took over their burrows. Now the dumb rabbits are too scared to go back to their homes. They’re just sitting there, out in the open, on the slopes of Long Hill, with their kittens squeaking and shivering around them. Don’t they know the foxes will be along soon? What’s to be done? I sure hate to see the little rabbit babies made homeless. For two cents, I might just go down there myself and send those Weasels packing, yessir, I just might do that.
To be continued…